Bully-Proof Your Child : How to Deal with Bullies

Mean kids aren't just a middle-school problem. The trouble has trickled to the youngest grades. Learn how to spot it - and how to protect your child.Not long ago, the idea that a preschooler could be a bully seemed crazy to me. But my outlook changed when my son Nicky was 4. A bruiser of a boy in his class would chase girls around the classroom and pinch them for fun. He frequently punched and smacked kids, and I once saw him kick a child who was playing with a wagon he wanted. The teachers spent a lot of time reprimanding this boy and explaining what "okay" behavior was, but his menacing acts continued and Nicky learned to steer clear of him.

That was just the beginning. In kindergarten, Nicky encountered a handful of kids who bothered everyone during recess. Last winter, a classmate told a girl he wanted to cut off her hair with a knife. The vice principal set up meetings with each class during which the teachers explained that every child has the right to feel safe at school.

Discuss Ways to Prevent Bullying

Brainstorm solutions to stop bullying before it happens or escalates. Develop and prepare a toolkit of ideas for kids to use in tough situations when it can be hard for them to think straight.

Create a List of Responses.

Practice phrases your child can use to tell someone to stop bullying behavior. These should be simple and direct, but not antagonistic: "Leave me alone." "Back off." "That wasn't nice." "I'm going to tell your mother." "Don't do that."